Tuesday, 25 August 2015

Review: The Human Centipede 3 (Final Sequence)

2015 Dieter Laser, Laurence R. Harvey, Bree Olson

As a die hard horror fan I have always been in defence of the 'Centipede' series, I applaud the first film for it's daring originality and applaud the second for its gross out, uber detailed and graphic depictions of medical procedures.
So naturally when I heard a third and final film in the franchise was being made I waited anxiously for more news. News of delays and complications were broadcast so often and I eventually lost interest and gave up any hope that it would even be released. Then out of the blue the Final Sequence is finally released on DVD and my curiosity peaks yet again, however nothing could prepare me for what I witnessed...

I shall simply start by saying I truly hate this film, I hate everything it stands for and it physically made me angry. It isn't even a film rather than a bunch of 'cheap shock value' sequences strung together by as many sexist, racist, offensive and repulsive lines of dialogue the director could think of.
This film literally sets out to offend everyone. But that's not my problem with it, my problem is that by trying so hard to offend and shock it just end up doing none of these things. I wasn't repulsed by the cheap tacky gore effects, I wasn't offended when women were treated badly or black people were abused. I felt absolutely nothing because it was so obvious and unnatural in it's delivery that it simply couldn't have any effect or even be taken seriously.
Sure genitals are mutilated, comatose patients are raped and open wounds are sodomised, but it is all dealt with such little care that its just eye roll worthy. The second film in the series took so much care in getting under your skin and making you shocked but this is just the definition of lazy!

I also must mention that Dieter Laser gave not only the worst performance in the film, but the worst performance I have ever seen in any piece of media ever. All those Paris Hilton cameos? Oscar material compared to this talentless hack. It is almost as if the director didn't even write a script and instead left this idiot to mumble and scream any obscenity that came to his tiny mind.

The Verdict

This film is nothing but a vile, lazy, crude, intelligence insulting piece of waste that should never have seen the light of day. A film so bad, so hateful, that you shouldn't even watch it out of curiosity. To give 90 minutes of your one life to this insult of a film would be a huge mistake.
An slap in the face and an insult not only to horror fan, but the word 'cinema' in general.

Tom Sixx take a bow.

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